I’ve become obsessed with antioxidents. It’s part of my anti-aging routine. I’m obsessed with aging, BTW. It gives me something to think about, you know, in the wake of my inevitable death and demise. Maybe, at the very least, I can control how much dangerous UVA and UVB light is reaching my delicate skin. And I can kill all the dangerous oxidents that attack every cell in my body every single day. That’s where the anti-oxidents come in.
So, because I’m crazy, (meaning conscientious of my diet and slightly over-educated on anti-aging cream), I’ve decided to incorporate as many antioxidents into my diet/lifestyle as possible.
Did you know wine has antioxidents? Beer? Chocolate? They do…well some kinds anyway. And that sure makes my life easier. Well, more interesting, maybe not easier.
However, the most fun part of this, is the descriptions you find on these products…products that probably aren’t very good for you, but are suddenly claiming to be because of their magical anti-oxident properties, like this one for Berry Ice Cream:
Found exclusively in the Brazilian rainforest, the exotic Açai berry’s royal purple pigment is a potent source of antioxidants, vitamins and minerals. Açai has been enjoyed for decades by the people of Brazil, who typically eat the pulp as an energizing snack throughout the day.
Oh why have the Brazilians been enjoying this treat for years when I, a god-fearing and money-laden American have not tasted it until just now! Why have I not been enjoying this energizing snack throughout my day! All I’ve had is dark chocolate and heart healthy nuts until now! The world is so unfair! Wait, how do you pronounce “acai?”
